My children are not Yes-kids

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A yes-man is a person who agrees with everything that is said; especially one who endorses or supports without criticism every opinion or proposal of an associate or superior. Take that and apply it to children, and you know what a yes-kid is. My two children are not yes kids. They challenge everyone and everything.

They reason (even if the reasoning is sometimes flawed) and negotiate. “Dad, can we stay up later than usual? We are on holidays after all.” “Mom, do I have to go to that school? Why can I not make my own choice of a school to attend?” They push the boundaries and look for opportunities to cross the line wherever possible. Traditionally, a parent should be disturbed about this, but I am not. I recognise that this ability to question everything will serve them well as adults when their parents are no longer there to shield them from the realities of life, and from wolves and snakes that prowl the jungle that is life.

As adults, they will come face to face with life: limitations, hindrances, and circumstances that tell them that they cannot do this or be that. This ability to test, prod, question, and challenge is exactly what they will need to handle those situations.

I do not recall much of my childhood, but the little memories that I have suggest to me that I was more of a yes child than not. I did what I was told without too much of a fuss (every child fusses). If I ever had any nonconformist traits as a child, they must have disappeared at some point in time. I behaved. As an adult, I have had to rediscover the nonconformist in me. When I did, I found that I loved it, and so I embraced it wholeheartedly. Crossing and/or redefining boundaries is fun and useful too in facing the challenges of life. I am glad that my children have those traits already, and I am determined not to stifle them.

Yes-men make the world go round, but rebels steer the course of things.

One comment

  1. My own children are no kids when I say no, they’ve learnt to say No, too…

    That way, they don’t grow up to be yes(wo)men…

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